When I said the prayer to accept Christ as my savior when I was six years old, I had no idea that it would be such a messy path. Car accidents and broken bones, singleness and hurt hearts, family problems and shattered trust. Life is messy.
Now, on the cusp of a new adventure, I feel God is calling me. Where? I have no clue. But it's there, tugging at my heart.
I'm reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan right now. And it's hitting me where I need it. Like a personal trainer for my soul. It's telling me, God is to be revered. God is to be trusted. And God asks us to give him everything.
A verse in there struck me today.
"Suppose a king is about to go to war against another king. Will he not first sit down and consider whether he is able with 10 thousand men to oppose the one coming against him with twenty thousand? If he is not able, he will send a delegation while the other is still a long way off and will ask for terms of peace. In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple."
Luke 14:31-33
That last part is heavy. Give up everything I have? What does that even look like? It's scary, but at the same time exciting. I want so badly to be there. To just be in complete communion with Christ. To be beautiful inside and out. To not be worried about the pain, the hurt, and just do what God asks.
So, I ask: What's stopping me?
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