Ruth and Sarah...

Sarah and Ruth. Both people in the Bible who had their lives totally turned upside down by circumstances they would have never predicted. Sarah, the wife of Abraham, had her life changed when her husband was suddenly called by God to leave their land and go on a mission in the dessert and ultimately become the father of the Jewish nation.
As I think about Sarah, with no children, and thinking her time was past to have children, laughing at God in disbelief, it totally resonates with where I am in life right now. At times, I'm in total unbelief that God has someone out there for me, who is ready to love me, and share life with me. I don't see it. I've been alone a long time. For the past six years I've lived alone. I've taken care of me, and only me. I've become this independent woman, capable of taking care of herself. While I see God at work in my life, I don't see where God's going to allow someone else to enter.
Sarah was the same way. She didn't see how God was going to fit a baby into her life. She was settled in as a woman without children. She had a life set for herself. She and Abraham were getting along just fine. Even though God had promised that Abraham's ancestors were going to become a great nation, they never knew how it was going to ultimately work out.
Abraham's faith never waivered, while Sarah's did. I'm like Sarah. My faith waivers often when I think about how God's going to provide a husband. I look around at the guys in my circle of friends, and I just think..."How, God?" Quality guys, but none for me.
And then I think of Ruth. In a new place, in new surroundings, taking care of Naomi. And she was alone, trying to provide for her and her mother-in-law. Totally sufficient, but lacking a husband, someone to share life with. And God provided, in some of the most unexpected ways.
I'm not sure how this story ends. God keeps writing it day by day. Hour by hour. Tear by frustrated tear. Some days I feel like Sarah, and other days I feel like Ruth. All days I feel alone.